The Dos and Don’ts When Introducing Sex Toys to Partnered Sex
There are several reasons why you may want to include toys in your sex life. Maybe your partner does not satisfy you, or you just want to take it to another level. Whatever you do, you must find a way to incorporate your better half. Below are some of the things you must-do if you want to balance your love life and sex toys.
Understanding That Using Sex Toys Is Normal
The first thing you need to do before you and your partner begin to use any sex toys is to understand that what you are doing not wrong in any way. Forget the myths you hear from the internet or friends. Expanding your sexual experience with accessory repertoire has no shame. Besides, you do not need spectators or allies to cheer and jeer you in bed.
We must admit that you feel weird from the first thought of this. Your partner will also feel the same when you introduce the topic to them. This is regardless of whether they belong to the LGBTQ category or they are straight.
Using sex toys can also be intimidating, especially if you or your partner (or both) come from a background with strict religious or cultural practices. So do not expect your better half to jump into it immediately. The good news is that almost everyone has information or ideal of sex toys. So when you are treading on familiar territories, when you bring up the topic.
Know When to Introduce the Topic
As said before, trying out toys in your sex life is normal, but you should bring out the topic at a reasonable time. Your partner may not be as excited as you are. They may even be defensive or feel offended at first. The acceptance of this topic of discussion will depend on the environment and the timing. If you get any of this wrong, you might bring irreconcilable differences or break up with your partner.
Your partner would not be happy if you introduced such a topic at their mother's birthday party. They may even get more offended to hear of your sexual dissatisfaction after a gruesome day at work. Before you start the discussions, read the mood, and pick a neutral time and environment when you are alone.
The best place and time to talk about sex toys is on a romantic date over tat bottle of expensive wine. At this time, you both know nothing else but your love life.
However, much of this topic relates to sex; never introduce it when you are in the process of making love. If you do it, only two responses are eminent; either they will hastily accept it, keep the moment alive, or they will immediately stop whatever they were doing and dash out. It comes with mixed reactions, and your partner may feel offended.
They may take it that you only focus on the missing part rather than enjoying the experience at hand. You may bring it up gradually at the beginning of foreplay. For example, if you know your partner has Tracy's dog somewhere, try to introduce it for play. But be sure that they are into the idea and you are not catching them unawares.
Know When It Is Too Soon and When It Is Not
If you are not in a relationship, it is quite OK to be using Tracy's dog at any time, anywhere when you feel like it. However, it would help if you took it slow when you get a partner. Try to learn their sexual fantasies and see whether they match what you want. Some people like it quiet while others will take it to beast mode from the first date. It is good to know when it is too soon to go in that direction.
You do not want to introduce a dildo or blindfold on your first sex night, but it sometimes depends on your relationship's motive. Before you do it, assess your comfort levels as well as your partner's openness. It would help if you took everything slow as your partner may misjudge your intentions.
It's like growing from birth to adulthood, and you should not skip any steps. For example, if you are just beginning your sex life, it would be suicidal to jump straight to anal beads or level 10 of the Tracy's Dog Pro 2 Clitoral Sucking Vibrator. Begin with level one and gradually grow with it until you can both hand the extreme levels.
Have a Mutual Goal and Be Collaborative
The sex toy path is something that should entice both of you. If you have something like Tracy's doll, let your partner know that you have it. Do not hide as when they find out it will be another thing altogether. Your partner may feel offended, and you might end up losing them.
If possible, try to shop for the sex toy together and decide what works best for both of you. Do not be inconsiderate and secretly do the purchase. Surprise in relationships is charming and enhances your love. But, never try it with sex toys unless you know how the other person will react to it.
Never bring a new sex toy to your bed if your partner disapproves of it. The best way to buy one is to go through the available options, whether you are buying online or from a brick and mortar store. It is only after their consent that you can bring something of the sort.
Similarly, do not carry a sex toy from your previous sex life to your new love affair. The similar is the same as sharing your partner with their ex; nobody would like that. It does not matter how clean the toys are; just dump them as you did your ex and get new ones. However, you can bring toys that you have been using for personal masturbation, and you have never shared them with anyone else. Even with that, seek your partner's consent before you can bring that vibrator.